overwhelmed but everything is fine.

WOW! The next couple of months for me are going to be amazing and challenging! There is so much joy, planning, excitement, worry, and stress going on all at once that I am just coasting by with a smile until a i hit a bump and readjust.

What's going on in my life...well here's a somewhat concise recap:

• Last weekend I had such an amazing time in Virginia with Crystal. My life is so full of happiness and fantastic memories because she is in my life. Sorry for the sap but my heart is overflowing with love

• Just had a grueling round of interviews for my 'development' which left me with some bumps and bruises. I'll get over it but man were they tough!
  
• I have a crush that I am trying to not push, even though my crush is not near.
• training for my new Logistics position and thinking about how i need to shine and be the best.
• I AM AN AUNT! Call me Auntie Nitsi! My cousin just had her 1st baby boy and I am so proud that i am crying! Congrats baby Donovan Silas Goldie! Born 9/10/09, 6lbs 2oz!
  
• Going to CALIFORNIA next week for 10 days to see my aforementioned nephew and family. I may not return from Cali. I will need support from my nearest and dearest to be "ok" back in Ohio.

• Then I start my new position at my new store leading a new team.
  
• I was invited to go to a new store opening to train in ALASKA on October 9th! WOW! What an honor! Watch out for some amazing glacier pictures!
• Then I go back to my store and try to get in to the swing of things. I need to hit the ground running and be great! No pressure.
• Fall brings pumpkins which brings me to ear-to-ear smiles since that means fall festivals, pumpkin farms, flavors, and carvings!
  
• It's my GOLDEN BIRTHDAY on October 25th! I hope to spend it with my soulmates and family.
• I plan on moving to a different apartment and location in the city and I am hoping that my plans go smoothly. I am actually wanting a roommate. I know I am not along but I do feel lonely sometimes. It's my downfall in some regards to almost always feel like I need to surrounded by people. Is that weird?

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My life is full of people and opportunities that not many people get to experience. I know how lucky I am to have a great support system out there in the world. However, today when I was grabbing lunch and holding back tears from my tough interviews I wished I could have turn back time to when my cousin Mandi and I were in middle/elementary school. Playing "Sharkie's" by her pool and having picnics by the creek at her house in North Carolina. Or having "shaving parties" at our cabin by the lake in Minnesota. Or playing kickball with Grandma and our brothers with no care in the world except for what the next lazy, fun summer day would bring us.

Growing up makes you think too much sometimes to the point that you forget to breathe and relax. I realize that just because we mature does not mean we need to stop living and being carefree, lord knows that I live by the edge of my seat, but just for a second, I want to go back. I want to feel less stressed. I want to be with my family who make me laugh and relaxed.



The things I am feeling are a bit overwhelming but writing and talking about them is my outlet. If I dwell on it for more than a couple days then I won't get myself out of a dark hole. I've been in that "hole" before and it's not fun. Very confined. Very lonely.


There is SO much for me to look forward to and I am excited for the events to come and ready for NEW things to be added to my list!

Thank you. Gracias.
Beijos...